


everythinggoes

by katsudonvik



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Spoilers, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, This story involves mpreg, Victuuri are broken up and have moved on
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:40:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27613597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katsudonvik/pseuds/katsudonvik
Summary: (Heads up that this story involves mpreg and infertility so if it's not your cup of tea then stay away from this)Katsuki Yuuri sits down for an interview in which he tells it as it is."Do you regret that relationship?""No. But I do regret how I went about it." He replied with a deep sigh."Can you explain that?" She asked leaning a bit closer towards him."What I mean is, those that know of me, who research facts about me know that I looked up to Viktor in many ways. I've always been a fan of him to the point that I would buy the magazines he was in and just be in awe. I was in love with his image. To me he was perfect and it wasn't until I met him and was able to actually know him that my image of him changed. Viktor wasn't perfect. No one is per-"
Relationships: Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov
Kudos: 22





	everythinggoes

**Author's Note:**

> This is actually one of the many plot ideas I had for " if I ruled the world" this being an mpreg, angst with no happy ending version per se. I mean victuuri don't end up together but in this case I don't see it as a bad thing.
> 
> I also wrote this years ago when I was going through a bad breakup and wrote this as a comfort fic to myself to remind myself that I'll be okay and I was/am okay

_ "The moment I saw Yuuri I was stunned. I tried my best to keep my professional mask on but was having trouble. The way he carried out himself told a story and Katsuki Yuuri was giving me a chance to hear it first hand. There's obviously two sides to every story and we've already heard Viktor Nikiforov's. This is how the interview with Japan's National Treasure went and let me warn you guys, it's a rollercoaster." _

"Yuuri, it's a pleasure meeting you." The female reporter bowed to Yuuri which surprised the male.

"Likewise." He replied with a smile.

"Are you happy?" 

Yuuri couldn't help but laugh out loud. What a way to kick off the interview. "So forward. I like that. To answer your question is a bit complicated. I mean Am I happy? I don't know. I guess? There's some moments when I feel like I could rule the world and other times it's the opposite, but that's normal, right? I doubt anyone is one hundred percent happy. So my answer is, no. But that's okay." Yuuri answered with honesty. Something the interview was revolved around, his honesty and setting things straight. He knew the media would always twist his words and over analyze everything as they've done for the past couple of years but he was going to give his actual point of view and not what so called expert's thought.

"I know you're expecting this question sometime throughout this interview but I want to just ask it right now and get it done with: Viktor Nikiforov." The reporter said looking at Yuuri's reaction.

"Ah yes, there's no escaping that conversation." Yuuri chuckled but didn't waver. He was in fact expecting for him to be brought up. "What's there to talk about? I mean, our relationship was out there and we both had a reputation. It was a relationship that happened out of the bloom and well, shit happens. We were young and lived vicariously." Yuuri responded as he tapped looked at the reporter straight in the eye.

"Do you regret that relationship?"

"No. But I do regret how I went about it." He replied with a deep sigh.

"Can you explain that?" She asked leaning a bit closer towards him.

"What I mean is, those that know of me, who research facts about me know that I looked up to Viktor in many ways. I've always been a fan of him to the point that I would buy the magazines he was in and just be in awe. I was in love with his image. To me he was perfect and it wasn't until I met him and was able to actually know him that my image of him changed. Viktor wasn't perfect. No one is perfect. Everyone has their own demons and a persona. It sadly took me a while to distinguish the persona with the real Viktor. As much as it pains me to say this, the person that I am now is because of Viktor and this isn't meant as an insult or whatever people want to call it. Viktor was my first love and my awakening to a lot of things, for that I thank him. Our relationship wasn't perfect but he did make me realize that I should love myself too. It isn't selfish or conceited to admire your growth."

"And why does it pain you to say that?"

"It pains me because it seems like we're always going to be put together. In this case I understand why he's being brought up, I did agree to this interview knowing full well he was going to be mentioned and I did let him know I was going to talk about it and he respected my decision. But, in many cases he's brought up in the worst ways, just as I am for him. I may have become more known to the media because we dated but my accomplishments aren't because of that, it's because I worked my ass off to get where i'm at. The same goes for him. He's a very talented person but we dated years ago. The relationship has sailed away and yes, we talk from time to time but we work in the same industry. Whatever happened between us is between us. I understand that the public just like our supporters want to know the details, but there's some stuff we just won't talk about.. We have the opportunity to say that our relationship didn't end nasty and bitter like it happens so often in this industry. It was painful, yes, but there was no cheating like the tabloids speculate." Yuuri clarified looking at the camera with an eyebrow raised. 

"Would you be able to say the reason of your breakup? I mean so the tabloids won't continue with the speculations." The reporter asked and Yuuri knew her aim. In another time he wouldn’t of answered the question but today was different. This was a somewhat tell all interview and he realized that he shouldn't be ashamed of himself because of his beliefs.

Yuuri looked down at his fingers trying to process the right words. "I can't have kids. I know and fully understand that this would normally, hurt but in fact, I've never seen kids in my future which upsets many people. I love kids, I sometimes take care of my friend's kids but to see myself actually have a kid, I don't see it. The fact that i'm infertile has never affected me the way it has to others and that was one thing Viktor thought differently. He's always wanted kids and has had this image of a family and doing family stuff but that wasn't and isn't me. Maybe in the future I'll want to have kids, maybe not but being infertile shouldn't define me. And to anyone who may be wondering, I really am okay about this. And to the tabloids out there, no, I am not jealous or bitter or whichever other hateful words you want to say about me. I get that you need clicks and views and drama sells but honestly, it's getting boring and repetitive." Yuuri finished off with a peace sign which made the camera crew chuckle.

"So are you okay seeing him live his dream with his husband that isn't you?"

"I'm okay because that's what he's wanted and if he's happy then, i'm happy for him. Viktor has every right to move on with his life and do as he wishes. Like I've said before, i'll always cherish what I've had with him but it's the past. I like to think that in life we meet people who teach us lessons about life and growing up. I have no ill feelings towards his husband. I'm actually thankful of him for making Viktor happy."

"And what about you, how is your personal life?"

"Right now i'm just going with the flow and seeing what happens. I'm in no rush. I like to think that if it's meant to be, then it'll be. If not, then that's fine. I've said that I wanted to love myself and that's what I've been doing or at least trying my best to do. As you know, I have anxiety and sometimes my mind becomes my biggest enemy but I try my best to overcome it. It's not easy and it'll never be that but I want to keep a positive outlook.. You know what I call that? Growth." Yuuri laughs and with that the Viktor Nikiforov as well as his personal life conversations are done and stored away. The rest of the interview is about Yuuri's work and him rambling about his best friend's; Phichit Chulanont newest musical debut. Something he's been promoting non stop on social media, to the surprise of everyone since Yuuri is known to not be online as much as the ladder.

  * \- - 



"That, that was, wow. I mean I don't know what to say." Murmured Chris as he pressed paused at Yuuri's relieved smile. It was as if he finally let go and the weight just left. He looked over to Viktor who just closed his eyes.

"I knew he was going to talk about us. Chris, he told me and asked for my consent and I gave it to him but hearing him actually say it feels.. it feels different. It feels wrong, feels like an out of body experience." He whispered refusing to look at the screen. He didn't know why he agreed to watch the interview. Okay, he did know why and it's why he asked Christophe to watch it with him incase he did or said something out of hand.

"You gave your point of view a long time ago and it was about time Yuuri gave his. We both know how Yuuri felt about you, he practically wore his heart on his sleeve so it was obvious his point of view would be different." Chris replied decided to just leave it as that. He couldn't exactly say the whole thing, the thing being that Yuuri loved Viktor the way Viktor never could. That Yuuri suffered more but because Viktor was his best friend he couldn't really be there for Yuuri the way he wanted. He hated thinking that Yuuri deserved better because that was such a shit thing to think about your best friend, that he wasn't good for Yuuri.

"Well, at least that's done for." Replied Viktor and stood up and went to grab a beer from the fridge. 

"Yeah." Replied Christophe to no one. He looked at the screen and pressed the home button, the screen switching to some foreign movie.

Viktor couldn't help but to take deep breaths in the kitchen. He was having so many mixed feelings. 

Anguish?

Anger?

Sadness?

Relieveness?

Part of him wanted to contact Yuuri but knew it would be a mistake. Just what did he expect to happen by contacting him?

Nothing, absolutely nothing because Yuuri wasn't that type of person. He was honest and a better person than him.

_ Fuck _ , Viktor felt a shiver through his body.

_ Did he really just think th- no, this wasn't and will never happen.  _

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Also, yes the title of this song is by RM. 
> 
> Bts member: Kim Namjoon also known as RM. The song is everythinggoes and I highly recommend listening to this song and just all of the songs from his album, mono


End file.
